Today marks my last day as an employee of the Sutter Creek Ice Cream Emporium. It's bittersweet, really. On one hand, it means I'm one step closer to the next step, but on the other, this place has seen me from gangly 17-year old clueless highs chool junior...to still gangly 19-year old, still clueless, college sophomore.
...okay, so to me it's more meaningful...
To commemorate my three years at the SCICE, I have compiled a list of how best to be a "memorable" customer:
1. Never say please. Ever.
2. Rearrange the chairs. And the tables. And the centerpieces. And when you leave, just go ahead and leave your chair in the middle of the aisle. Really.
3. No scoop should be the right size, no matter what. A child's scoop is too small, naturally, and you couldn't possibly finish a whole single scoop. Why would they think that? You know, the best way to settle this is to get angry. Really, really angry. Ask to see the manager, she has nothing going on, after all.
4. Order a double scoop for your 4-year-old. In fact, order it on a sugar cone. Even better? Insist that he doesn't need a napkin.
5. If your food isn't ready in less than a minute, by all means, march back into the kitchen and demand to know what's taking so long.
6. Change your order no less than three times.
7. Pay for a pack of gum with a twenty.
8. Pay for a sandwich with dimes and quarters.
9. Allow your children free reign of the toy display and card racks. The stickier their fingers, the better.
10. Order everything in "to go" containers, then leave them on the tables.
11. [Bonus] Tell your server how to do his or her job. They certainly don't have a clue.
=]
ReplyDeletesometimes, I think I really like it when you're angry..